Triality Life & Reality

Like the image above, the Ascension Process and Embodiment Process have been us steadily moving up ENERGY stair-steps until one finally reaches the landing of the next higher flight of stairs. One makes the directional turn to continue moving up the next higher flight of stairs where one is eventually met again with a higher landing and flight of stairs. On and on it goes, higher and higher up the ascending energy stair-steps and deeper and deeper into the Photon Light, the entire time one is being incrementally transformed by the Process and Journey itself.

I can easily say—as I know many of you also can—that the entire year of 2019 so far has been one of the most difficult, trying, exhausting, frustrating, physically and emotionally painful and simultaneously freeing ascension year ever. It has, at times, been brutal and continues to be brutal for many and that’s how the literal dismantling of dying worlds, realities and lower selves feels—brutal. There is no just ‘beam me up Scotty’ with compressed evolution, only steady laborious effort to get ones First Everythinger self up the multiple flights of energy stairs while doing a whole host of other related things.

For me every month of 2019 has been the equivalent of an entire flight of energetic ascension stairs. Many of us are bounding up multiple stair-steps at a time each month this year, which causes increased intensity in the physical side effect pains and pressures we’re feeling from doing this. How 2019 has been for you, and felt to your body, should help you grasp how all-encompassing this upcoming global Shift will be in January 2020. We First Everythingers, Forerunners, Embodiers etc. always go first to embody and anchor the NEW codes, energies and DNA into ascending physicality for the rest of humanity that will come into contact with them later. In this case, “later” is the start of 2020. Those humans capable of embodying them in 2020 won’t experience this evolutionary Shift into the NEW codes in the same ways we have and will transition into them more easily.

Old duality and duality consciousness and reality was you “here” and all the “good shit” waaaay “over there” somewhere, permanently out of reach and ultimately unattainable in any direct personal sort of way, if at all. Duality was about experiencing separation of everything down to the most ridiculous, minuscule levels in old patriarchal reality.  Talk about brutal!

Trio, trinity, triality, triplex, trifecta, threesome, triad, triple crown, triplicate.

I love how you can know something at one stage and level but as you grow, expand, embody and become more you discover that what you first knew was only a very small part of something considerably larger and exceptionally more complex. It’s like discovering that a new toy has many more features and functions than you first realized. This has been the case for me with triality and trinity consciousness and reality. I’ve known only the beginner, “newbie” stages of it and over time have discovered that I am and I AM simultaneously all over the place Working constantly on the Ascension Process and Embodiment Process and much more. This is somewhat hard to express and I’ve tried many times over these ascension years in different ways and at different personal levels.

I’m “here”; I’m “not here”; I AM while I’m “here”; I AM while I’m everywhere; I am exhausted; I AM NEW; I am strengthened and empowered, and I keep going because there’s nothing else to do other than the Embodiment Process and ascension. Can you relate? More importantly, can you feel the tremendous increasing changes and amplifying freedoms from all of your, all of our collective personal Inner Work, effort, ongoing Embodiment, dedication and determination?

This next part is me trying to describe the nearly impossible non-linear, quantum, multiple aspects past, present, future me’s and their different levels and abilities and tasks.

When “I” freakout over whatever it may be in that moment, Denise me momentarily loses the higher overall functionality of my multidimensional Selves. Every time I’ve done this, it’s the old past Denise of pre-ascension Earth panicking over something that, for that moment, I believe I cannot deal with or fix etc. In other words, it’s past Denise feeling and believing she is powerless in that moment and situation, whatever it is. The keyword and insight with this is past.

When “I” Denise am altogether deep in painful ascension symptoms that make life nearly impossible to accomplish much of anything physically, that’s “me” in current present moment and time living the ascension Embodiment Process. It’s entirely focused, painful in multiple ways, and thoroughly isolating but it’s absolutely necessary and more important than one would believe.

Since 2013 I’ve many times beat myself up over the fact that once “I” am deep in another phase of severe and intense ascension caused symptoms and painful side effects there isn’t one damned thing I can do to get myself out of it. I cannot end the physical pains, nor can I end the emotional pains or the periods of depression when they’ve overwhelmed me. All “I” can do is live through them, and when I’m smart, pay attention to them all and learn whatever I can from the entire Process. In other words, all “I” have been able to do with those severe phases is ride it out.

I’m drawing attention to this because, like I said, I’ve often gotten upset with myself for not being able to reduce or override, shorten or quicken the severe ascension side effects that just freakin’ lay you flat for days or weeks. We’re all so programmed to do whatever we can to immediately “fix” or “heal” or “treat” when we feel bad, sick or sad. However, for those of us who are First Everythingers, Forerunners, energetic Pathpavers and Embodiers, it’s the present “me” and the present “you” living those aches and pains whose responsibilty and Mission it is to live, feel and be alchemically evolved by the higher frequency Light energies no matter how severe they are to our physical bodies and emotional selves. We’re supposed to go through these changes because we Volunteered to Embody first, Ascend first, anchor and Pathpave for present and future humanity.

My first true Work with learning about becoming Neutral was through my severe physical and at times emotional depression phases of the Ascension Process. Becoming Neutral about them was the easy way for me to accept, lay back, open myself in every way, relax and surrender to the alchemical Process of compressed evolution as a Volunteer, even when it really hurt(s). Becoming physically and emotionally Neutral about it all was the best and most graceful and grace-filled way I’ve found to deal with being a living transmutation container for compressed evolution, plus, learn about evolving beyond duality and being reactionary to integrated Triality and Neutrality frequencies, consciousness and being. You can turn pains into states of quantum Divine revelation and freedom if, if you’re willing to surrender and trust your Divinity and why you’re experiencing them. Or my natal Sun Chiron conjunction is finally transcending, or both. 😉

The present “me” and present “you” reading this who’ve been living it are the aspects that accomplish more than you’d first believe. If it weren’t for the present “you” and “me” currently living the Embodiment Process, the past and the future aspects of each of us wouldn’t be much help to us or us to them. It’s the “you” aspect in the current middle, the present Now Moment “you” that’s the one whose capable of embodying, Embodying, anchoring and therefore altering your physical body, consciousness, self and external reality for yourself and for everyone else. A really important aspect wouldn’t you agree?

When “I” Denise am altogether empowered, excited, full of Creative LOVE, in “cheerleader mode”, knowing and powerful, I am future “me” Denise whose ‘been there, done that’ already so she already knows what’s what and why and what’s coming next and so on. That future “me” knows all about the things that present “me” has, is and will be going through and Embodying etc. To the future “me”, everything is Divine and perfect, on scheduled and unfolding better and faster than intended.

Now, if you can take these three, these triple crown, triality, trinity, threesome aspects of yourself I just talked about—the past, present, and future “you’s” living the Ascension Embodiment Processes and all Working together to accomplish this in physical reality, if you can take them from linear to Spherical quantum consciousness then you’ll really get what I’m struggling to express. Go from linear awareness and seeming separation to, Hey babe, it’s ALL YOU and it’s ALL happening NOW!, and the entire Ascension and Embodiment Process makes much more sense to this present aspect self.

Past you freaks out over whatever from time to time. Present you is exhausted and beat to hell from being the Living Alchemical Container for the entire Ascension and Embodiment Process in the physical dimension in a physical body. Future you is the NEW Human, is the NEW Earth, NEW Humanity, the NEW YOU and is getting very excited because the other “you’s” have been at this business long enough that the “good shit” is on the brink of manifesting physically finally.

The key here is to never forget that you are also You and YOU, and even more and that ALL of you are and always have been Working together to get this thing called the Ascension Process done. And don’t ever forget that the present “you” is more powerful, strong and sacred than you have yet understood.

A few days ago I suddenly clairvoyantly Saw another massive energy Wave or energy pulsation coming towards us and Earth, but it was only a few feet away from me when I Saw it. The closeness and size of it made me go wide-eyed for a moment but it told me that there’s another huge energy pulsation about to hit us. I suspect it’s the September 2019 Equinox energies I Saw but what was more important to me was the knowing that there’s going to be nearly constant, I repeat, nearly constant energy waves or pulsations like this from here on out that will more quickly than anything prior, tear down the old past everything while simultaneously anchoring in much more of the future NEW energies, codes, consciousness, DNA and external reality in our present now. And this is just the beginner level of our becoming conscious of our multidimensionality, our being both linear and non-linear beings capable of Shifting all over the place, repeatedly.

What has been separated and far apart from each other are now only inches away, which means Triality past, present and future is about to become the NEW now everything individually, collectively and externally.

Because of all this and more, many of us have been and will be experiencing more so-called anomalies with linear time, linear space, linear consciousness and reality, the Separation of Worlds & Timelines, the Embodiment of our Higher Self/Selves with present us in our physical bodies and all that has been, is and will continue to quickly expand and evolve in each of us. Said another way, it’s gonna get even more weird and wonderful fellow Ascension and Embodiment co-Workers!

Because of all this don’t freakout or panic during those moments when “reality” just disappears from you and you’re left floating in the black vastness of a NEW level and state of being. It will soon be filled with NEW exceptionally good stuff. Don’t panic when linear time stops and you’re going about your business in timeless quantumness, Neutrality and lengthy Now Moment HighHeart being. Don’t panic when some negative old whatever or whoever etherically wafts through your home briefly on its way out. Don’t feel bad for feeling bad because who else can do what you can for you and for All? From here on out things are going to increasingly get both worse from one perspective and vastly better from another — the final Separation of Worlds. Ride this one out too just as you have for the past twenty, twenty-five or thirty years in this life. Be the many “you’s” and be them becoming consciously aware of each other all Working together so NEW Earth and NEW Humanity can happen and have a NEW place to step into.


September 13, 2019

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Copyright © Denise Le Fay & HighHeartLife, 2019. All rights reserved. You may share this article so long as you don’t alter it in any way, the content remains complete, credit is given to the author and this URL and Copyright Notice are included.

50 thoughts on “Triality Life & Reality

  • I appreciate everything from everyone here. Im walking into a river and not walking out. Nothing but love for each of you. It’s time.
    Thanks for the love this whole year has been too much.
    Thanks for the kindness.
    God bless

    • No, no, no!
      Whoever you are Skoop you are too valuable and are needed for what you do in ways that you don’ t know. Yes it’s an hour by hour life at times but you are not alone…. 😦
      Hugs from the Southern Hemisphere

  • This is so clarifying! Thank you, Denise. I had this experience just today during my meditation/napping time. Old melancholia was in my face but I quickly realized it wasn’t really me but a past version of me. Then I got up and was led to this article. This also explains the flashes of euphoria and New Earth-type visions that don’t seem to stick around very long.

  • Thank you, thank you so so much 💙💛
    I’ve been feeling increasingly alone, because I Am. I always knew this gig would not be easy – hitting the ground with both feet running, as I’m slowing beginning to realise.

    The void, neutrality has become increasingly stronger for me. Since May, my embodiment (return to Self) increased massively, and my tiny physical body went from 42kg up to 52kg over the summer in order to house more without killing it off entirely! Talk about literal expansion! I (We) lost a great friend and companion in August and I’ve since “had some big boots to fill” – it was time to pass on the mantle. It’s been brutal, in more ways than I can express, and indeed there’s been some great, vast leaps up those stairs whilst wearing those boots.

    Thank you for talking about the depression that comes in, I’ve felt that for the past few days – flat even. It comes in Waves. And yes! All there is, is to ride it out, “ride that wave” as I was told many years ago.
    Gratitude to you Denise 💙💜 and a whole lotta love 💖

    • Welcome littlemedium to HighHeartLife, and I love your user name. 😀

      Most of us all have packed on more physical bulk to, as you correctly said, be able to embody more Light, more NEW energies, NEW DNA and so on.

      I’ve been paying attention to this for a while to make sure that what my physical body was doing was related to what I thought it was. I’m now positive about it. What I’m talking about is that at this stage of the Embodiment Process, whenever I fall asleep during the day, even if it’s only for a few minutes, when I wake up my entire upper belly into the diaphragm area is “bloated” and swollen, distended and feels absolutely miserable. This area of my, of many of our bodies is like this the majority of the time anyway, but, after I’ve had a daytime nap which I do almost every day now, every time I wake up I’m MORE bloated in this area. This particular ascension symptom has been referred to as Buddha Belly for years. Master Hotei thinks it’s hilarious but that’s Master Hotei — aka the Laughing Buddha — and he thinks everything is hilarious. 😉 ❤

      Point is that we continue to EXPAND physically and energetically (our ongoing growing "Light quotient") every day because we're embodying more and higher frequency Light energies constantly. My taking a nap each day is me getting out of my physical body, and while I'm going that I am energetically "rebooted" so to speak and then return to my body with more Light and NEW energies and codes and DNA etc. The embodiment of these higher and higher frequencies and Light energies etc. is registered in my, in our physical belly and upper belly area as this distended bloat or swelling or Buddha Belly business. It’s the fact that we’re now capable of embodying more EVERY DAY that’s amazing.

      • Thank you Denise, it’s about high time that I step on in 😘
        😂 Buddha belly is exactly it!! And I really do need to laugh more with my morphing body! It does get uncomfortable though, particularly when I don’t listen to my body and eat something that is simply not appropriate for it – caught up in the collective energies 🙄 the swelling can also effect my legs/feet as it moves through 🧬💎

        During naps, I hear the crystalline frequencies you’ve spoken of in other comments and I can only liken their sound to that of a pulsar. And they’ve definitely been getting faster/higher/stronger this past week.

        Indeed, it’s taken a lot to get “here”. It’s truly amazing, and a testament to the work that’s been undertaken in order to get Us to This Point. Phew!! 💙

  • Denise I loved this article 💜 (and the rest too)! You explained with such clarity using examples of your 3 different aspect’s: past, present, and future. I can clearly see all the times I switch into these 3 different aspect’s of myself. I previously was referring to these aspect’s of myself by calling my lower self what you have described as past you, my current self as present you, and my higher self as the future you aspect. The switch is very distinct and something I have been observing.

    For example, at the beginning of this year I remember writing an excited comment of how I felt January 2020 was something we’ve all been waiting for. You had replied back saying how you felt similar. That was my future aspect speaking while jumping with joy saying yes yes yesssss, bring it on universe! This conjunction will be having the most effect on the cardinal signs (Capricorn, Cancer, Libra, Aries) and my sun/moon/rising are all cardinal. As we near the Saturn Pluto conjunction my past aspect is having a major freak out to the point I wake up with daily anxiety. Then my present self in the now is saying there’s no where around it but through it, whatever that situation(s)/experience(s) may be that play out. And how I’ll be fine, the same way I always have been, as I end up making it through somehow even though it’s unknown to me as of now and have zero clue as to how I will make it through. My present self is also saying to allow Saturn/Pluto to obliterate whatever they need to on my path (which I’m guessing is the last person remaining in my life, as everything and everyone else is already gone), but despite all this my past aspect is still having fear come up. Several days ago I came across one of your previous articles I had not read before dated 2012 on Transitions called “Ascension & Earning Money” (link: and I wanted to thank you for what you shared even though it’s old I felt it was very relevant even now for me. You shared how doing something in dense physical is different from planning to do it from non-physical higher dimensions . And how we set up pre-incarnational situations so we could live the AP/EP, do what we volunteered to do, and not end up living under some freeway over-ramp or stave/freeze while doing so. I feel like I’m getting close to that freeway over-ramp/freezing/starving situation 👎. Or what I’m interpreting as me entering a potential not dark, or darker, but “darkest night of the soul” is actually freedom that you shared about that at this point my past/present self is unable to see. I was contemplating sleeping in a car instead but I’ve never owned one so that’s not an option, with no job, no one or no nothing, a body that’s barely functioning, and money savings to get me through only for a few months… no wonder certain aspects of myself are feeling afraid. I’ve been cultivating a deeper faith and trust in divine timing, and surrendering as I have also been observing a give up/wanting to check out energy surfacing for the past few months (not give up on the AP/EP process but everything else).

    I was going to send this as my first email to Denise as a part of me feels embarrassed or a failure for being in such a position but figured posting it here for all may help someone else to relate who is going through a similar situation, has been or will be going through. Once we’re on this AP/EP path can we mess up or is our progress inevitable even if we accidentally end up taking a longer route? (If there’s even such a thing). The pressure is high on making the “right” choices 😞. For example, us actively leaving someone/place/situation or waiting to see by observing how the Saturn Pluto conjunction plays out in our lives before making any decisions. Only thing is, people are saying after January it will be too late with all that Capricorn energy, the fear of being locked in/remaining stuck in that timeline if we accidentally choose the wrong one. Because if that’s the case then there’s only these remaining 3 months left to make decisions?

      • I agree 10tinbluebirds … you are not alone, Prabhi K … this is a very dark night of the soul for me, too., most days full of fear, all my triggers being pushed, when trust is hard to find and my inner/future self is almost impossible to find/hear.. So grateful for this community … we are not alone. Thank you for everything, Denise. Love you all. ❤❤

        • Prabhi K, I have had the thought/feeling that I would need to live in my car a time or two over the years. Fortunately for me, there was a musician called Jewel who had been living out of her car when she “made it”, so I had a story to latch onto that if it should come to that for me, maybe it would be the last thing before I too “made it”. 🙂

    • Prabhi K.,

      I’m sorry I haven’t responded to you sooner but honestly, I had a couple days this week where I was way down emotionally over some stuff and was in no condition to help you. At that moment I just couldn’t deal with anymore suffering from anyone or anything which is why I didn’t respond to you.

      My Sun and Moon and more are Cardinal so I can relate. You know that every three months as the Sun nears any Cardinal sign, it’s either conjuncting, squaring or opposing your natal Cardinal planets and ASC. As harsh as this may sound to some, this too is part of the AP and EP in that we’re anchoring in the NEW energies in really personal, physical and all other ways right through our bodies and energies. This is like how many ascension teachers are Earth signs in these Ascension Process lives. They anchor the NEW into the Earth, into physical reality through their bodies and selves.

      I too have been having to make big changes in my life, living and finances since June because my mom died. She exited her physical life and body and at the same time I became unemployed so it’s been multiple big shifts since June 2019. Like you I too worried and still do worry when I momentarily forget who and what I AM, about not having any income coming in. Old money fears exploded to the surface for me to deal with and transcend, or be eaten alive by them. You too will not only survive what all you’re going through now but you will thrive because you have released more of your past and those in it and embodied more of the NEW energies that are giving us more and more freedom in all ways. It’s both terrifying and freeing and many of us have been going through these super intense, difficult and expansive processes this year.

      I suggest that you do as I have been and do daily and/or nightly or both periods of highly focused Conscious Creating and intending and visualizing etc. for yourself. State what you want and need out-loud from a level of intentional Creation, not worry or fear, need or panic etc. Be super empowered, powerful, be 100% certain that you are capable of intentionally Consciously Creating what you want and need and desire now and for the rest of your live. Period. No doubts, no hoping, no wishing, no praying to an external deity, just YOU doing for YOU from this NEW higher way. We’re all having to learn how to be Conscious Creators now and also that we’re UN-creating old lower things and situations etc. too. It’s called becoming increasingly Sovereign because we’re becoming increasingly Conscious Creators. 🙂

      State what you want, need, desire immediately to help you in all the ways you need. State those things every day and/or every night or both with absolute certainty and higher knowing that you will receive them as quickly as possible. After you’ve stated very intently what you want and need etc., then leave some energetic space open for those things you’re intending and Consciously Creating to come to you in ways you may not be aware of. Be open to wonderful surprises, changes, manifestations and ways for those things you want to come to you that you can’t imagine today. Don’t limit in other words. State and intend what you want and need but also allow extra “room” for them to come to you in ways and people and locations and situations etc. that you’re not aware of now. It’s during our moments of hopelessness, desperation, fear, worry, doubt and confusion etc. that we HAVE to “shift” into what we really are and how powerful we actually are and re-learn how to be Conscious Creators for ourselves and others when needed.

      “I was going to send this as my first email to Denise as a part of me feels embarrassed or a failure for being in such a position but figured posting it here for all may help someone else to relate who is going through a similar situation, has been or will be going through.”

      Thank You Prabhi K for doing that, for being that honest, that generous, that HighHearted. ❤ ❤ ❤

      When I get freaked out over whatever, I too get way too much in my head, we all do this, and it sounds like you're doing it too over all these things you're going through and considering. I can't tell you how many times I've repeatedly had to force myself back out of my head (the mind, thinking, intellectualizing, wondering, second guessing, waiting, worrying etc.) and into my HIGHHEART. It's hard because we're so used to using our heads to problem solve but that doesn't work now like it used to because we've evolved into a higher state. Stop yourself from running around like a mad woman inside your head and intentionally place yourself, your awareness, your focus back in your HighHeart area and then FEEL instead of thinking. Ask your questions about these things and situations but do so from your HighHeart, not your head/mind and then pay close attention to how you FEEL almost instantly after you've asked a question. The answers come now in these more subtle and higher frequency FEELING ways. You'll know instantly after you’ve asked a question because you can FEEL if it’s correct or incorrect for you at that time. You will KNOW in this NEW, higher way of functioning from your HighHeart instead of your head. We’re still sort of on the “cusp” with this too because we’re half here and half there still.

      The January 2020 Saturn Pluto conjunction in Capricorn will fully deliver and anchor into the physical realm the NEW codes for mass humanity. The old will be removed and replaced with NEW energies and codes. This alone will instantly alter everything for the rest of humanity. We’ve been Working on it for a long time already, but it becomes the NEW external “reality” once this one and only exact conjunction happens in January 2020. Only you can know what’s best for you right now today with your confusion over staying or leaving etc. FEEL into it and Consciously Create every day and you will make this shift fine just like many of us are currently doing. ❤ ❤ ❤

      • Prabhi K & All,

        I just found this great, funny and wise astrological article by Dana Mrkich. She’s a Pisces with Capricorn ASC, I’m a Capricorn with Pisces ASC so I enjoy how she communicates what she does.

        I think we all can relate to what she calls the ‘Saturn and South Node walkabout’ they did for 5 months of 2019. Thanks for this Dana Mrkich, and for the giggles. ❤

      • Dear Denise, thank you for being so strong a pillar for all of us. Although I’m a Sagittarius in my sun sign with likely two water signs in my ascendant and moon, because of my Capricorn stellium of which I think I have at least four planets in that sign, wow, I’ve always had to be extremely practical which often equated to being very frugal, responsible, unexciting when others were out partying or otherwise splurging even on insignificant things like buying coffee. To be honest I actually am thankful for the good this sign has brought me, keeps me down to earth and less of a space cadet …so whenever you or others here write anything in regards to the money issue or the career issue and etc. I am so ever thankful for reading for your sharing. I can’t overstate this.

      • Thank you Kathy for also sharing your experience, I’m also grateful for this community. ❤️

        Thanks 10inbluebirds for sharing your thought/feeling as well. And yes you’re right, seeing that last thing as a turning point.

        Denise, it’s perfectly fine if you responded after than you wished you could have. I totally understand and relate as this happens to me often. I feel it’s important we all give each the space needed as so much is going on at once! Yes Denise, I too have more cardinal, I just mentioned the main 3. Thank you for sharing about the conjunction/squaring/opposing as the sun nears any cardinal sign. You’re doing an excellent job teaching/sharing about ascension as an Earth sign. ✨ And you’re right about getting too much in our heads at times when getting freaked out, a constant weighing the scales back and forth. Thanks for the reminder to force myself out of my head as you shared and FEEL. I had started this conscious creating as you so beautifully shared as I felt guided to do so back in Spring of this year. Did it for a week or so and then totally forgot about it due to the brutality of the last few months. Thank you so so much Denise for reminding me, I will be incorporating this into my life and this time saying it out-loud.

        Highheart hugs 🤗😘

    • Hi, Prabhi K,
      I spent a couple of months camping on or near Mt. Shasta. Not as exciting as what Sandra Walter has experienced (and before she went there), but it seemed adventurous at the time. Then later periods of sleeping in my car – and glad to while I had it – until I didn’t, and spent way too many nights sleeping upright at the 24-hour McDonald’s or grocery store cafe. Sometimes I knew I was O.K., and it was just temporary. Sometimes fear took over and I wondered if I would ever live like a normal person again. Seems to come with the territory of breaking down the old structures in preparation for the new. What I eventually realized was that I was always alright,even in the toughest times, and some of those times carried great blessings that I could only see clearly after the fact. The past couple of years have been easier as housing goes (though many other challenges and purging old energies, ideas, beliefs). I’ve lately been feeling a return of the ability to dream and envision again. Denise’s comments about Consciously Creating is wonderful advice. As 10tinbluebirds said, you are not alone. Sending love, Blue Dragonfly

  • Hi Denise and everyone,

    Ever since I was little I remember forcing myself to relive the ugly memories and facing it straight on; my part in it, their parts in it, forgiving myself and them and releasing the memories. This act alone has changed the alchemy of my personality to a point where I became more and more “unique” and “lonely”, and yet surrounded by so many people who just liked my “vibes.”

    Then one day I hear about ascension and how important it was to clear, purge and let go. For the longest time I felt like it was something new, something I must learn to do, until it dawned on me that’s what I was instinctively doing for as long as I can remember.

    I guess people like us were just born with all the tools necessary to do this job.

    Anyone feeling a constant low grade headache that travels all over the skull throughout the day? Ear ringing, diarrhea, nausea, reality zooming in and out and sometimes wobbling, inner vibrating, heart beating outta my chest…these I’m used to but the constant low grade headache is new. Also, the instant need to poop purge when forced to talk to people who are unawakened and low vibe; I guess they’d be called portal people.

    I’ve also noticed that I no longer need to “clear” my self, my space or energy field in such moments, it is instantly cleared. It is as if I “leveled up” and everything is instantaneous now, just Being myself is all that’s required, no more need to Do. Wow, talk about living in the 5D, I get it finally.

    Oh and thank you Richard for the very informative and reassuring video link and thank you Denise, well, for everything.

    • “Also, the instant need to poop purge when forced to talk to people who are unawakened and low vibe; I guess they’d be called portal people.”

      Jain Lee,

      This is what I meant in my comment to Richard & All about how we not only have been Creating the NEW by living the AP and EP and Embodying, but how we also have been continuously UN-creating the old lower stuff/energies/consciousness too. The “purging” we do through hot flash heat, sweating, burning etc., and through all the other side effects including diarrhea and/or pooping excessive amounts are us literally UN-creating the old lower frequency residual negative energies. Energy is energy, but we’ve Volunteered to Embody the NEW higher energies while also energetically dismantling, un-knoting and transmuting energies that were negative and dense etc. and return them to a “Neutral” state of pure energy. We’ve been doing BOTH since the very beginning of the Ascension Process.

      “I’ve also noticed that I no longer need to “clear” my self, my space or energy field in such moments, it is instantly cleared. It is as if I “leveled up” and everything is instantaneous now, just Being myself is all that’s required, no more need to Do. Wow, talk about living in the 5D, I get it finally.”

      Exactly. Once each of us individually does our own Inner Energy Work on our stuff and junk, we’re clear and more capable of Embodying higher and higher Light energies, NEW codes and so on. What we continue doing however is the UN-creating half of all this, but we now do it for mass humanity, the human global collective exclusively. Stair-steps! We UN-create the old negative density stuff that humans have created (and Team Dark beings) across time on Earth to clear that crap so Earth and us and those humans that are able to evolve into these NEW higher energies can do so with less density making the entire Process even more difficult. We energetically create a NEW clear Path for us, Earth and all humans capable of evolving now and we’ve been doing this by UN-creating the old negativity and density — aka all the purging we do through our physical bodies — and by embodying and Embodying the NEW higher incoming Light energies and NEW codes, NEW DNA etc. as well.

      The farther into the EP each of us goes, the more we’re able to understand about what we’ve been doing in, with and through ourselves for the Ascension Process all along. Amazing on many, many levels. ❤

      And yes, I've been having that low-grade headache you mentioned lately. I normally don't have them but at some point in August 2019, I noticed I was having a mild and almost constant low-grade headache, along with another increase in the sound/tone of the inner ear ringing which is now super high-pitched Crystalline squealing. Also, I've noticed that the Sun has changed ever so slightly about three times (that I've noticed so far) just since August 2019! It did so again just the other day. These changes are subtle but I See them as the sunlight turns a pale blueish color for a few hours. I doubt it's actually blue but that's just how I See it every time the Sun is "leveled-up". The Sun Embodies more higher frequency Photon Light which is registered in our bodies as increased side effects/symptoms aches and pains, higher pitched inner ear sounds constantly, head/skull pains and on and on. We all "level-up" together and every time we do this we also UN-create more too.

      • Thank you Denise, you mention “un-creating” and a piece of a puzzle just fit for me. My friends and family have mentioned events that apparently I was a part of and I have NO such memories of these events. And it’s not just me, it seems the internet is flooded with people experiencing such phenomenas and chalking it up to a timeline change or Mandela Effect.
        I too have dismissed these things as a timeline change but thank you for clarifying that we’re now at a point of un-creating the old and co-creating the new Earth.

    • Hello Jain Lee,
      Yes, the constant low grade headaches are one of my usual’s.

      Hello Denise,
      I’m adding the reply to your comment from the previous article here as I’m not sure if anyone will see it there as it’s been a while:
      You’re right about the body getting hit with the energies and moving around the body (be it digestive for a while, then head, then lower body, then a dehydration phase, etc). That’s exactly how it is! Different concentrated phases rotating/switching around the body in addition to the usual symptoms. Thanks Barbara and Denise for the portable potty joke/emoji.. made me giggle. Also thanks Richard for sharing (and yes it does go beyond just fiber as I get loads of it myself). For me it has been a daily symptom for almost 7 years now. Since it’s one of my daily “usual’s”, I feel others might also be experiencing it when it gets intense for me, that’s how I know we’re in a digestive phase! 🚽

  • Great descriptions, Denise. Being a “first everythinger” myself, I can truly feel and see what you’re saying. The past 7 years for me has been physically and emotionally devastating, which I am grateful for because the ego de-construction has opened me up in ways I never could have imagined, and revealed a true purpose I never knew I was here for. Thank you. — Boyd Martin

    • Denise.
      There are some messages coming out now that collaborate everything you have written about concerning August in particular and our entire journey in general. Here is the recent one I thought you like::

      • Richard & All,

        As everyone knows, I very rarely allow links to other people’s sites or articles or videos etc. etc. on my sites. The reason for this is because, since I’ve been writing online (TRANSITIONS 2007), there have been MORE people spreading incorrect information about the Ascension Process and related topics than people writing about these things without any distortions. What I have been doing online since 2003, then only at TRANSITIONS (from 2007) and HighHeartLife (from 2013), was hard enough. I wasn’t going to make my Work any harder for myself or any of my readers and all of the other Volunteers, Starseeds, Blue Rays etc. than it already was by sharing links to certain people’s incorrect online information. You see, I’ve always known that I have been one of those who, as this young woman — Lorie Ladd — who I’ve only just now discovered through this link, called us, “designed to clear for the collective”. I’ve always consciously known this about myself in this lifetime and I’ve even written about how good I am at it. Many of us are and this video link by this young woman correctly explains the reasons why.

        I like her very much because she’s expressing correct information that had NO distortions or bullshit or deluded egoic crap in it. If I had a daughter, she’d be this young woman! 😆 I also enjoyed the fact that she not only gets the AP and the ups and downs and puking and shitting and purging and all of it, but she’s also got the Neutrality aspect of it figured out too, thanks to the Pleiadians that interact with her/her with them. I also enjoyed her being honest enough to curse, many times in this video. There are so, so many that believe, incorrectly but they believe that if one is higher vibration, they don’t curse, poop, fart, have lowly thoughts and/or emotions, get angry or any of the other human traits. This was one of many things I tried in this article to express, and I’ve done the same in many others since 2007.

        ⭐ The next part I’m going to say is super important everyone.

        We First Everythingers, we Volunteers, we Transmuters, we Embodiers are and have been doing BOTH things simultaneously. We have been and still are and will continue to for a while yet, EMBODY our Higher Self/Selves/Soul into our physical bodies and personalities. We do that and we ALSO go through seriously nasty, painful, difficult, dark and unpleasant phases where we TRANSMUTE AND CLEAR THE LOWER EVERYTHING FOR THE ENTIRE HUMAN COLLECTIVE AND HIGHER DIMENSIONS AND BEINGS TOO. We are Conscious Creators AND we are UNCREATORS as well. We Embody the NEW higher while we UNCREATE the old lower and purge it out of existence.

        Light in, low dense nastiness energetically neutralized and purged out — rinse and repeat as often as needed.

        That is the “magic formula” and why we are so very valuable. Not many are capable of doing this while in a physical body in a physical world that’s been nothing but Darkness for thousands of years. Like I’ve said multiple times over the years, don’t feel bad for feeling bad, and, it won’t always be this hard and painful. 🙂

        I suggest everyone watch the Lorie Ladd video link Richard shared and then re-read my article, and most all my old ones too! The Ascension dust is clearing enough now for more of us to better understand, consciously, what we’ve actually been doing all along. Just imagine how great the NEW “good shit” is going to be once there’s no more need for us to rinse and repeat as needed. 😀

        • Denise, wow. This is so good and helpful in clarifying what you are saying. I had that how much can you love yourself in the eye of the storm moment last night, so seeing this tonight is perfection. Thank you for all you do and for sharing. ❤

          Should say thank you to you AND Richard!!

        • OMG thank you Denise and Richard and Lorie … exactly what I needed to hear today after a particularly intense couple of days (another dark night if the soul). But phew … feel better now. Great video … and terrific writing as always, Denise. 👍❤❤❤

    • Denise, I wrote something but I’m not sure if I submitted it properly. I wanted to add that two days ago the sun seemed profoundly changed again. I’m in Louisiana, southern Louisiana right now. I was at a plantation. I walked in and I was overwhelmed by energy above me just before a line of very old oak trees. It was so much energy and bright gold white scales of light above me and above the oak trees once I came underneath him. It was so odd because to my right were slave quarters. I thought to myself, how could this energy be here when this place had that going on. Sugar plantations were brutal, the worst of the worst for slaves. And yet there was all this light and energy. It was incredible to experience… all of it is gone I realized slowly and the only the new is present. It’s really gone. That which created THAT is gone. It was also completely apparent to me that it was a disgrace to turn slave quarters into museum pieces. But it was overwhelming and beautiful and heartbreaking to FEEL and experience the NEW residing, presiding over all now, in a space that was once horrifically dominated by brutality and stoic pride once upon a time. All the past is not present anymore. Not energetically. I cried and cried.

  • Yes, Yes and Yes! My heart read this post with complete understanding and knowing. I too felt time stopping last week around 4:00 am though. The blasting ear noises disappeared for a short moment and all was eerily still. Afterwards, I felt I had choices to be made. I also feel myself surrendering and things become so much easier and totally move on without emotional baggage just by having this neutral calm state that I’m experiencing more and more…that state grabs my attention and then I realize that ” Yes! I’m Am doing this!” Thank you Denise for this post.

  • Denise,
    Thank you so much for this article! After I read it, it stayed on my mind all day – and the word RENDITION kept coming up in my mind. Rendition is the torture of prisoners until they “break” and spill all their secrets or die. I realized my physical body feels like that is what is happening for the past decade or more. I am a word-lover/logophile and I researched the word “rendition”. says rendition means “surrender of a place or possession” “to deliver, to yield” and I realized I’d been subconsciously feeling the need to surrender – practice neutrality for this whole process, especially the physical body abject misery. Resistance causes even more pain and comes from past experiences while surrender/neutrality shifts my presently painful self to a future perspective. I hope, maybe, I am beginning to understand your beautiful description of “spherical consciousness”.
    Thank you so much! I really appreciate you!

    • Also of note regarding the word rendition, the primary definition is, a performance or interpretation, especially of a dramatic role or piece of music. I had never heard of your definition before. It is what Oxford lists as a secondary meaning for this noun. I thought it might be helpful to consider this primary def as it lends credence to all being part of the process. 😊

  • Hi! I am filled with such radiant life and light and cheeky humour! And to prove my stair climbing venture, last night in my dream I was driving along when a giant wooden stake was blasted thru my windshield! Missed me by a mile! 😂 Have a blessed day and lots of funnies too!😍

  • As one that has been on this path for 33 years after an extremely traumatic event broke me wide open I am reremembering what I learned then. Let go. Surrender. I am getting better and better at that. Personally I think I have shifted into a much higher vibrational space. Old aches and pains and physical problems are healing (on their own as I gave up on them years ago). I am also feeling much stronger and empowered and am getting huge support from the universe in everything I attempt. I am so grateful. I just hope it lasts! Thank you Denise for helping so much to keep us moving forward.

  • You’re simply the best, Denise! – And again; can’t be said often enough; all my love to all of you lightwarriors out there; we’re no longer easily spooked by ANYthing! – We’re winning now; does’nt it feel good?

  • Profound, Denise…Every atom of every word written here is actual and ongoing TRUTH, captured by you and lived by me and your many followers daily if not moment-to-moment…All of the physical/mental/emotional spiritual shifts that I’ve experienced since the beginning of September have been EPIC (the anger at not being able to “do it all better” has been so surprising), and yet here I am, being with all of it in as surrendered a place as possible. To All Others Here (yes, caps are definitely apropos), your Comments are so helpful and expansive, and I thank you all deeply. At this point, absolutely everything that appears in my life is part of the personal/planetary/cosmic AP/EP journey, and I allow no other possibilities to exist. With my natal Chiron conjunct my Cap ascendant, I’m right there with you Denise in transcending all of our past and present distortions…As someone once said (and I paraphrase), “If you’re not spending your moments transcending, then you’re dying.”…and by golly, I’m definitely not there yet! To you Denise and All Here, my sincerest love/Love/LOVE…and ONWARD!

  • “Past you freaks out over whatever from time to time. Present you is exhausted and beat to hell from being the Living Alchemical Container for the entire Ascension and Embodiment Process in the physical dimension in a physical body. Future you is the NEW Human, is the NEW Earth, NEW Humanity, the NEW YOU and is getting very excited because the other “you’s” have been at this business long enough that the “good shit” is on the brink of manifesting physically finally.”

    THANK YOU’S, Denise, things clicking here, TRI-LIGHT light bulbs going on everywhere: yes, Yes, YES! Just yesterday I experienced an hour or so of “been at this business long enough that the “good shit” is on the brink of manifesting physically finally.” I didn’t have those words, but darned close. Instead of SHTF, it’s GSHTF! This article I will re-read many times as there is a LOT of info here and I especially need to get handle on when I’m HERE and when I’m not. And, ditto, thank you for putting into words for the Volunteers/Pathpavers what we need to know when we need to know it so that we can carry on. Much LOVE to you and to All Here. B.

  • Dear Denise…this post took my breath away!
    It is brilliant…and, it filled my heart and soul. You are always self effacing about your perceived difficulty in expressing the complexities of the AP and EP. Be assured that this piece of writing has great clarity. I resonate with all of it.
    Blessing to you, Bright Light…

    • Bless your HighHeart Sarai, thank you for that. ❤

      I am very glad it has the ‘clarity’ you mentioned because so many of these 5D+ levels and topics are difficult to express in such a linear form as writing and speaking is. We try nonetheless. 🙂

  • Thank you Denise! I literally don’t know How you are putting words to this process. Most days I feel like a babbling idiot except for the few moments when I don’t! Last night, for a split second, as I lay in my bed for the 3am wake up call, I heard my husbands breathing and the fan in the room dissappear. The sound was gone long enough that I thought ” I wonder what Denise would say about this” then Sound came back. I have no clue where it went or maybe where I went. Thank you, thank you for sharing your experiences with us. It’s the only thing that helps me to feel sane most days!
    Much love to all the “tired and wired”!

    • “Last night, for a split second, as I lay in my bed for the 3am wake up call, I heard my husbands breathing and the fan in the room dissappear. The sound was gone long enough that I thought ” I wonder what Denise would say about this” then Sound came back.”

      sz oldsoul2017,

      I’ve heard “reality” disappear like this too, I’ve also seen it disappear which makes things interesting for a few moments! 😮 When that has happened, I wait to see what manifests next because you know you’ll pull something into focus or change channels or whatever, but it certainly makes for a few exciting moments when “reality” isn’t there but you still are. Great punch line to that one. 😉

      Because we’re literally ON THE MOVE and have been for many years now due to the AP and dimensional transition from old 3D, thru 4D, to reach and land in 5D frequency, there’s been these weird disconnects with old familiar realities. They’re here and then they’re gone because we continue to SHIFT CONSTANTLY. Many people believe this “Shift” is a one and done thing where it’s really been a constant ongoing Process we’ve been living — those energy stair-steps I’m always mentioning. We Shift many times every day and night and sometimes when this is happening “reality” goes dark, disappears, goes silent, stretches way out, bends, morphs and does all sorts of strange things. And increasingly we’re seeing, hearing, feeling and watching these Shift and Separation of Worlds & Timelines anomalies and having our consciousness expanded greatly because of it. It’s gotten hard to not only define ourselves in those old ways we all did, but it’s also gotten hard to define where we are, even day to day because we’re so profoundly in transit into greater and higher frequencies and NEW spaces, worlds and consciousness.

      “Most days I feel like a babbling idiot except for the few moments when I don’t!”

      Me too. 🙂 ❤

  • Thank you, Denise. No other ascension writers open the door to forgiveness, grace and compassion for the present Me as much as you do. ❤️❤️❤️

  • Love especially this part: “is getting very excited because the other “you’s” have been at this business long enough that the “good shit” is on the brink of manifesting physically finally.”

    The key here is to never forget that you are also You and YOU, and even more and that ALL of you are and always have been Working together to get this thing called the Ascension Process done. And don’t ever forget that the present “you” is more powerful, strong and sacred than you have yet understood.” Yes! And my Spirit whines a little with this clarification when I read your post: Yes the process is happening more intensely fast FOR us only because the plan was repeatedly delayed so that every last straggler who was supposed to be in this round could come aboard. So we are still serving/sacrificing for others that the speed comes now BC we collectively decided to wait for others *rolls 5th dimensional eyes* hahaha 🙄😱👽😘🌕

  • Brilliant, Denise, brilliant. You’ve managed to put into words how I’ve been feeling and what I’ve been experiencing for many years, but you’re right: especially in 2019. It’s really amped-up this year. I found this especially salient:

    “Since 2013 I’ve many times beat myself up over the fact that once “I” am deep in another phase of severe and intense ascension caused symptoms and painful side effects there isn’t one damned thing I can do to get myself out of it. I cannot end the physical pains, nor can I end the emotional pains or the periods of depression when they’ve overwhelmed me. All “I” can do is live through them, and when I’m smart, pay attention to them all and learn whatever I can from the entire Process. In other words, all “I” have been able to do with those severe phases is ride it out.”

    Yup. I often think of it as the Hanged Man in Tarot, upside down and in a weird position with my hands tied, and so there’s nothing to do except relax into it. It’s kind of been the whole point. Lately, too, after a long, DRY spell of no contact with my 5D future self, the past few weeks I’ve seen and felt and experienced myself in this realm through thoughts and dreams. It’s been so long since I’ve been able to experience this aspect of Me. It’s even been a bit confusing as I’ve been in the Now-Present and to some degree the Past, that I’d forgotten there even was a Future self. I think I’ve just had my nose to the grindstone, going up those stair steps because that’s just what I DO these days. 😁 I’m so glad to know you’ve been in much of the same zone— and that you’ve been in touch with that experience of the Future self as well. ❤️

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