I’m not sure where to even start this article because things are so different, and at times, downright strange and surreal which is to be expected in all honesty. I just do my best when the weird factor gets extra thick for a while because I’ve learned that it passes, or I’ll pass through it, or both those things is closer to the truth actually.
I mentioned in a recent article (November 2015 I think) that one of the “symptoms” I’d been having was suddenly discovering that my body was crying. Tears would be flowing down my face but I was not emotionally feeling or reacting to anything that I was aware of at that time. It’s another strange Ascension related symptom or side effect and one that I haven’t had a lot over the years. I trust however that something truly wonderful is happening at some level within me, and that this Denise aspect doesn’t always need to consciously know what it is. If I’m meant to know, then I will, otherwise just roll with it and don’t go into fear over anything NEW and different taking place internally/externally.
What I’ve been experiencing increasingly in December 2015, is realizing that at times I’m smiling and have no old lower type reason to be smiling. After this happened a few times this week, I forced myself to pay attention to what was taking place in me at those moments. What I discovered was that my body and face smiling was the same thing as when it cried last month; it was responding to more of the old lower disappearing and the NEW higher replacing it. It was responding to more of the Greater, Higher ME embodying in this incarnate Denise aspect in physicality at this time. It was responding to a little more of Home being embodied in me physically, making this Denise version incarnate in physicality a living aspect of Home right here right now. That would make one cry and smile wouldn’t it? 😉 ❤
I’ve noticed that when a little more of the Greater ME enters/embodies this incarnate Denise version in physicality, that NEW higher part is not having as much difficulty knowing what certain things are down here in Earth life. The first few times this happened to me back in the late 90’s and early 2000’s, that newly embodied bit felt very much to me like some alien that didn’t know what door meant or why they existed, or what put trash barrels out meant, or what swallow after chewing food meant and other equally common 3D physical things meant and why they needed to be done. Thankfully this is no longer the case, and every time a little more Home and/or the Greater Higher ME embodies physically, I’m the one now needing to acclimate, adapt, adjust to the changes.
We’ve been so preoccupied with and focused on how it would look and feel when these incarnate versions of us down here in physicality went up, ascended, got closer to Home etc., that we or at least I didn’t think much about looking at this Process from the other direction. Consider it from the perspective of the Higher being embodied into this incarnate aspect of me Denise alive within physicality. (This is obviously old dualized 1/2, either/or, higher/lower type consciousness.) Just one more aspect of that weird factor I was talking about. The two are reuniting, merging as ONE which is something far above old lower duality and dualized consciousness and being.
Back to suddenly discovering that I’m smiling when I have no old lower world/consciousness reason to be doing so.
In those moments when I realized my face was smiling on its own, and after I checked in to see why, I realized my HighHeart (upper center chest area) was again greatly expanded energetically and literally radiating like a Lighthouse because more Home and more of the Higher Greater ME was now in residence there. Great gratitude, bliss factor, we did it!, OMG it’s finally happening!, did I pay the rent this month or only think about doing it? and dozens of other equally ridiculous reactions to having some more embodied Source/God/Higher Self merge with you, down here in physicality, which now is actually way up there.
So yeah, involuntary smiling and crying, repeated HighHeart expansions, more necessary layer peeling and releasing, more dying and resurrection step-by-step as something very NEW and different runs the NEW show, yet still needs to pay bills, put gas in the car, do laundry, shave, shampoo and so on. How long this phase and level lasts for some of us is something we’ll each figure out as we individually acclimate and adjust to having more Home in house/body/Self/consciousness/life.
I remember writing years ago at TRANSITIONS about how we really needed to remember to dream bigger, aim higher etc. because there was so, so, much more available to each of us than what we could comprehend or remember at that time. I feel the same way today, even while all this is amazing is happening in me, in you, in us.
‘Did you dream big enough, aim high enough Denise? ‘
‘No, but I’ll tweak things to fit better as I go.’
‘Good, you’ll want and need to over time.’
I’ve always had these ME (Higher) and me (lower self/Self) conversations but they’re evolving like crazy now as one would expect when the ME and the me are merging and becoming ONE in the physical in one unified, integrated body. You realize that this is just the bare-bones basics of this unfolding merging Process we’re going through now right? Of course there’s going to be some moments of confusion, disorientation and seeming “weirdness”, along side moments of sheer awe and brilliance lighting up everything everywhere. Just roll with it all and smile and cry when needed because a lot is taking place within many of the Forerunners now. If and when needed, peel off more layers of the old lower you and the consciousness, beliefs and expectations etc. that went with it because what’s really available is so very much larger and better than your/my/our biggest, highest dreams. Aim higher, dream bigger, then Create beyond all that.
Amidst this current Process of merging, unifying Higher/lower, which automatically produces something NEW, many of us are having some weird and/or very weird experiences, visions, dreams, hearing unrecognizable sounds, feeling certain emotions from the bottom of the old dark 3D dualized barrel, to feeling moments of merging HighHeart expanding bliss from being back in Home energies again while in-body in physicality. There’s been some physical body pains, some crap old emotions from old family stuff (yet another layer needing to be peeled off and released immediately), some Cosmic movements of energies and old and NEW being moved, and some deliberate stirring of the global pot by the Old Boys Club. Lots going on but we knew this phase would be intense, weird, wonderful and so worth the “admission price”. 😉
Most happy and high Creative Sagittarius and Capricorn everyone as we nail down 2015 in preparation to enter the NEW fully physically with the start of 2016. Celebrate the weird because you’ve worked very long and very hard for it. ❤
Denise
December 15, 2015
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Copyright © Denise LeFay & HighHeartLife, 2015. Use or duplication of this material is strictly prohibited. All rights reserved.
a co-worker came into my office a couple of weeks ago and asked me if I was aware that I smiled while I worked. I was not aware and found it very curious that I am smiling for no apparent reason. I thought it was just one of my quirks, but maybe not 😉
Deep gratitude Denise, totally concur with this, like an old friend that went away and thank god is coming back………love ya Linda
Gratitude most immense for your writings as “knowing” at least one other has traveled this particular journey has helped more than I could possibly convey. Highest blessings
Thanks Denise! I’m right there with you! *hugs* from another Forerunner. 🙂
Denise, thanks for this blog! Guess I’ve been fortunate to have had the tears without content for months. Wow, is my crown full as I write! The energy is saying YES, YES, YES! I’m a mystic and all my life, I’ve cried when I did not have words for high influx of emotion…any emotion…joy, happiness, love, bliss, wonder, ecstasy. Now I wonder if I’ve always been getting a mixture. blessings